Cancer Shmancer

Wow, OK, so it has been a while since I've blogged. Honestly, I don't know how I will be able to keep up with this thing, although it is cathartic!

So, for those of you that don't know, and as a re-cap for those that do, my sister Pauline has been diagnosed with Stage 2 Hodgkin's Lymphoma. She has a mass in her chest and some spots around her clavicle. Pardon my French here, but THAT BASTARD! I'm not sure who this cancer thinks he is, but he is messing with the wrong girl here! She has dealt with a different kind of cancer before (when looking up cancer in the dictionary, please note the alternate meaning: ex-husband). Anyway, she is going to kick it's a$$!

All kidding aside, I know that she has the strength to handle this. It makes me so sad that she has to embark on this journey that she did not ask for. I know that good can come of this. That it will strengthen her faith, and mine as well. I hope that we truely learn to live each day like it's our last. I decided that it was a waste of time to ask God "WHY?". It doesn't matter why. This is redundant, "why". The question to ask God is "HOW?". Help her to get through this. How can I help her to get through this? How can this journey make us all stronger? And it's about faith isn't it? At some point, it is out of the hands of my sister. It is out of the hands of the oncologists. Ultimately, it is in the hands of God. I'm no theologist, but I am a thinker. I'm thinking...who better than God to leave it up to? In my heart, I know she is going to be OK....no matter what.

So, it really sucks the air out of you when you find out that your big sis has the big "C". I want to cry, and I do when I can. But I have to remain strong for the kids. I can't be all weepy around them. It can scare them and they don't understand. How do you explain cancer to a 4 year old? When my Dad died, I watched my Mom literally crumble to the ground. That does something to a person. You lose one parent, and the other one crumbles before you. So, I can really push my emotions away to the corner of my mind, where they hang out and fester. This is not healthy. I don't recommend doing this. It has come in handy though. I can be calm in front of the kids as well as my Mom and sisters. Who wants to see me being all weepy anyway? Thank God I have J.R. I can talk to him and cry on his shoulder. The love of my life and my best friend.

And so it begins. Pauline will have the port for chemo put in tomorrow and have a class called "chemo education". Now it's time to fight. To be strong. To keep the faith. To pray.

So, I say....cancer shmancer. "I can do ALL things through HIM who strengthens me" Phil 4:13

Disney 2008 Highlights

Oh, the wonderful world of Disney! What a great trip! We were sad to leave, happy to be home, and ready to plan our next trip. A true sign of an awesome vacation. So much happened that there is no way I can re-tell every single thing that happened, so here are the highlights!

* Walking into the Wilderness Lodge Resort made me feel like we were on a true vacation. It is such a beautiful and understated resort...and the Dances With Wolves music completed that western, National Park feel.

* At dinner on Sunday night, Rebecca took an oath to...and I quote " stay up really, really late; wake up really, really early; eat lots and lots of sugar; ask for everything I see; and never-ever go to Universal Studios". She took her oath VERY seriously!

* The rides. How fun is that! J.R. and I had just as much fun as the kids did, laughed harder I think, and savored the joy on the kids faces. Pure, unadulterated FUN!

* Upon meeting Captain Hook, he teasingly tried to remove Rebecca's bracelet with his hook. She promptly slapped his hook and told him to "stop it!". What a riot...he met his match!

* The food. WOW! I was really impressed! Salmon and couscous salad for lunch with Pooh and plenty of healthy options for the kids. Way to go Disney!

* Meeting the characters. You must understand that to the kids, these characters are the real deal. The looks on there faces alone was worth the price of the trip. And I must say...Mickey seemed like the real deal to me too! I even got a kiss from him!

* Fire works in the comfort of our jammies. The view from our room ROCKED!

* Roman's infatuation with pretty princesses. Cinderella and Snow White in particular. What a riot...I'm going to have to lock him up when he's older.

* Mickey Mouse shaped ice cream. I don't care who you are, that's fun right there.

*In the airport in Orlando, waiting for the plane to Houston, I decided it would be best to use the ladies room. Mind you, there was about an hour and a half before our plane was set to take off. So when I get back Rebecca tells me, very seriously " You missed the plane Mom. They said everybody get on, and you weren't here, and it left!" Then she cracks up laughing. I thought J.R. had put her up to it, but no, it was all Rebecca. Bravo Wee-One...well played.

* The overwhelming "MIMI!" when we saw my Mom waiting for us at the airport.

* Rebecca telling me today that she misses the fireworks. Me too.

La Familia

Whew. What a weekend! We made the obligatory trip down to Eagle Pass and The Ranch this weekend. I was not really looking forward to it to be honest. It takes a while to get to E.P., it's hot, it can be a little boring there sometimes, I don't really speak Spanish...which makes it a little harder. But I have to say, I really enjoyed this trip.
I'm glad that I didn't take a book or magazine. It was fun to see Samantha and how much she has changed. She is so good with the kids! I enjoyed Grandma Consuelo enjoying the kids. I enjoyed the love that poured from her eyes. I enjoyed hearing Roman say "Gate-Gamma" over and over. By the time we left he was saying "Ah-wel-ti-ta"....abuelita. Then we go to Tio Canuto's place, where upon arrival, we find two horses saddled up and ready to ride. What an experience...especially for Rebecca. She absolutely loved it. She also learned how to shoot a BB gun! Too funny.
Then there is the Ranch. I always love the ranch. I love it when EVERYONE is there, and I love it when it's just us and Grandpa and Grandma. A day at the ranch is always and adventure for the kids. More kids should have a ranch with great-grandparents on it to go visit! Our kids are truly blessed! I pulled together every Spanish word I know and gave it my best shot to talk to Grandma Bertha...who is always patient with my horrible attempts at Spanish. Somehow, we manage just fine though, and I love her. She reminds me of my own grandma.
So, the trip turned out not to be an obligation at all. The kids are so lucky to still have 3 great-grandparents! I know that Rebecca will remember them, and God willing, they will be around long enough for Roman to remember them too.
Disney World is going to be a blast, and we all get caught up in our own little worlds, but it's good to stop sometimes and remember what is truly important...la familia.

Disney, Here We Come!

So, we leave in 13 days for sunny Orlando and the World of Disney! I am so excited I can hardly stand it. Rebecca has stopped dreaming about dinosaurs (thank goodness) and started dreaming about Mickey Mouse. Even Roman knows that something is going on! This will be our first official family vacation. No visiting family, no obligations, just pure, unadulterated FUN! As much as J.R. and I would like to hole up on a beach somewhere and drink tropical drinks sans the kids, we can't help but to be excited about this trip! We can't wait to see their faces and reactions to the whole experience...from the plane ride to the fire works, and everything in between. There will be time enough for "Mommy and Daddy' vacations...they are only little once, they only believe in this stuff for a little while.

"A dream is a wish your heart makes

When you're fast asleep

In dreams you lose your heartaches

Whatever you wish for, you keep

Have faith in your dreams and someday

Your rainbow will come smiling thru

No matter how your heart is grieving

If you keep on believing

the dream that you wish will come true"

You said it Cinderella! See you in the land of the Mouse!

Happy Birthday

So, all week I've been in a kind of funk. I chalked it up as P.M.S. and moved on. Until today, when it came into light...today would have been my Dad's 61st birthday. It's hard to believe that after 15 years, that it can still feel this raw. You never get over something like the death of a parent. You just keep moving forward. Kind of like Dory in "Finding Nemo"..."just keep swimming, just keep swimming".

Last night, J.R. took Rebecca to the Spurs game. We couldn't get a babysitter, so instead of giving up the tickets, he took our #1 Spurs fan. I was SO excited for her, and not jealous like I thought I would be! (as I am the #2 Spurs fan) I realized that she was going to have a date with her Daddy and that she will probably remember it for years to come.

My Dad loved basketball. I think he loved the Spurs. Someone asked me once if Dad went to the Spurs games. He never did. I'm sure that he would have loved to, and I'm sure he would have loved to have taken us girls. He always watched the games on TV. As a matter of fact, he and I watched the Spurs in the Western Conference finals the night before he died. If I remember correctly, they lost, and we complained that they had the potential, but couldn't convert. The last thing we said to each other was "I love you".

I thank God that he blessed me with the father that I had...even if it was only for 15 years.

I thank God that he has blessed Rebecca and Roman with a Daddy so much like their Papa Fincke that it's spooky.

I thank God for RRR, who included me in on one of his quirky e-mails today that made me feel like a daughter, and not a daughter-in-law...

...I needed that today.

Alice The Camel Has Two Humps

If a picture is worth a thousand words, then check this out...

The First Post

Well, hello. Hello everyone! This is just our little blog site where I can post what's going on in our lives. We are a pretty well-oiled operation these days. J.R. is working for Ricochet Energy as a Geologist looking for natural gas. I stay at home to take care of the kids and to keep this family running smoothly...I'm still waiting to hear from the payroll department, as I have yet to receive a paycheck. Rebecca is 4 and in pre-K and loves life. Roman, almost 2, is our little man...ALL BOY...he keeps his Mama very busy! Check out the blog from time to time...I plan on posting funny tidbits about the kids, important events, political fodder, and anything else that tickles my fancy!